Sikh Wedding: Blissful Union

In India, we have so many festival-related rituals one of them is the Wedding.  A wedding is a ceremony where two unknown people meet, and share their feelings with each other as a couple

and are united by a ritual called marriage. 


In India not only couple are united, but their families were also involved in it.


At the wedding, we have a lot of traditions and customs that have to vary greatly between cultures 


Most wedding ceremonies involve an exchange of marriage vows by the couple, a presentation of a gift, and a public proclamation of marriage by an authority figure or celebrant. Special wedding garments are often worn, and the ceremony is sometimes followed by a wedding reception Music, poetry, prayers, or readings from religious texts or literature are also commonly incorporated into the ceremony.



Sikh Wedding Rituals





In Sikh, the wedding is known as Anand Karaj, a Sikh wedding comprises of many rituals and functions that usually go on for about a week. Unlike in Hindu marriages, where the pandit fixes an auspicious date for the wedding, a Sikh wedding does not follow such considerations. Instead, it takes place in the morning on a date mutually decided by the families of the bride and the groom. The couple takes Pheras in a gurudwara in front of the holy Guru Granth Sahib.


Roka and Thaka  

Parental consent is considered to be of the utmost importance when it comes to a Sikh wedding. Be it a love match or an arranged one, the parents of both the bride and the groom must express their consent for the union before the wedding proceedings can progress further. Roka and Thaka, two of the most important pre-wedding rituals, is the flip side of the same coin that celebrates the involvement of parents and their wholehearted support. The father of the bride visits the groom’s place and expresses his approval and appreciation by applying a tilak on the groom’s forehead and presenting him with gifts of sweets, clothes, etc. The same ritual is practiced by the groom’s parents for the bride. The Roka/Thaka may take place either on the day or a few days before the engagement ceremony.


Kurmai

Kurmai refers to the formal engagement ceremony that takes place at the groom’s house or at the gurudwara. Close friends and family from both sides attend this event. Before the engagement formalities begin, the priest or Granthi offers a short prayer. Generally, the groom presents a ring to the bride who accepts the same. The bride’s family presents the groom with a Kara, the mandatory steel bangle that Sikh men need to wear, and a Kripan, a small knife that is a reminder of the Sikh’s heroic heritage. A red scarf is placed on the groom’s shoulders, around his neck and a few dried dates are placed on the groom’s hands. As per the instructions of the Granthi, the grandfather of the bride feeds the dates to the groom. After these formalities are over, all the guests are served food and drink.


Akhand Paath

Generally, the weekend before the date of the Anand Karaj is fixed, readers from the family sit down at the house or at the gurudwara to read the entire Guru Granth Sahib within 48 hours. The non-readers assist the reader by providing them with nourishment. Both the bride and the groom’s family hold this ritual separately. This event aims to explain to the bride and groom the importance of religion and the teachings from Guru Granth Sahib outlining the pious way of living. 


Kirtan 

Kirtan is a performance of religious music. Before Anand Karaj, the Sikhs consider it a good omen to hold at least one Kirtan performance at their residence. Experienced musicians, known as Raagis, associated with the local gurudwara sing ‘Gurbani’ accompanied by tabla and harmoniums.


Ardas 

On the days leading up to the Anand Karaj, the family members visit the gurudwara daily to offer prayers. They cover their heads and wash their hands and feet before entering the prayer hall. Next, they open the Guru Granth Sahib at a random page and start reading and reciting the prayers out loud. 


Karah Prasad and Langar

A sweet Prasad is made by the family members at the gurudwara with semolina, flour, ghee, and nuts. After completion of the prayers, the Prasad is distributed among the attendees. The attendees also devour the community-style meal at the gurudwara known as Langar.


Shagan 


The bride’s family sends the groom’s family gifts before the wedding. These gifts are presented in beautifully decorated trays and are carried by the bride’s relatives to the groom’s house. Generally, sweets, fruits, dry fruits, clothes, and coconut are included in the Shagan.


Chunni Chadana 

A few days before the Anand Karaj, the groom’s female relatives visit the bride’s place bringing her an outfit she is supposed to wear on her wedding day, including jewelry, accessories, makeup kits, etc. The mother of the groom covers the bride’s head with a sanctified headscarf or chunni. This signifies that she has accepted the bride to be a part of her family. 


Maiya 

This refers to a cleansing ceremony. The bride/groom is made to sit down on a stool and oil is applied to their hair while turmeric paste is applied on their body. A red cloth is held over their heads with female relatives holding up each corner. The remaining female guests sing traditional wedding songs. The ceremony takes place on any of the preceding five days from the wedding. 


Karahi Chadana  

Five days before the wedding, the karahi chadana ritual is observed by Sikh families. A large Karahi or Wok is set up in the kitchen and all the food items – savory or sweet are cooked in that. Guests are served from the same vessel during these five days. 


Warna 


The Warna ritual is performed on the bride and the groom by various family members on days before the wedding. Any amount of currency notes are waved around the bride’s/groom’s head clockwise and the money is then given away to charity. This is done to cast away any evil energy surrounding the would-be couple.


Gaana

The next ritual is Gana, wherein a red thread is tied on the right wrist of the groom and on the left wrist of the bride. This is considered to protect them from ill omen.


Gharoli  

The bride or the groom’s sister-in-law visits a nearby gurudwara and fills up a special earthenware pot called Gharoli with holy water. She brings the water-filled pot back to the house which is then used to bathe the bride/groom after their Vantaa. 


Vatnaa 

A paste is made of turmeric, barley, and mustard by the women of the house. The bride/groom is made to sit on a low stool and the married women of the family anoint them with the specially prepared paste. Wedding songs are sung for the occasion and there is a general sense of merriment. 


Mehendi

The Mehendi ceremony is practiced two or three days before the wedding. Henna paste is applied to the bride’s hands and feet in elaborately beautiful patterns. The women of the family gather for this occasion and have henna designs applied to their hands as well. There is a copious amount of fun and festivities, with the singing of traditional wedding songs. 


Chooda and Kalire 
 
The maternal uncle of the bride gifts her Chooda, a set of 21 red and white bangles. Before the ceremony, these bangles have to be sanctified by washing them with curd and rosewater. Once the bride has worn the bangles, they are covered with a silk shawl so that she cannot see them. 
After the chooda ceremony, the relatives of the bride come up to her and tie umbrella-shaped metallic ornaments called Kalire to her bangles and offer their blessings. All the unmarried friends and relatives of the bride are lined up and she moves the Kalire over each girl’s head. It is believed that on whosever head a Kalire falls, she will be the next one to get married.


Wedding Attire

Traditional Sikh grooms prefer wearing Kurta, generally white in color, over which they don an Achkan or long overcoat. The achkan is often made of premium fabrics like silk or brocade. Nowadays grooms also wear Sherwanis over the kurta instead of a traditional achkan. The Achkan or the Sherwani are highly embellished with threadwork, beadwork, and even with precious stone settings sometimes. He pairs either the Achkan or the Sherwani with a Churidar Pajama. The groom also sports a traditional ‘Mojri’ as part of his wedding outfit which is an embellished slipper. The groom is required to sport a beard as a symbol of adherence to the Sikh faith and he is supposed to wear a turban around his head, typically of pink cloth. 
A typical Sikh bride prefers to wear a highly ornate, beautifully embroidered set of Salwar Kameez. Red is a much-preferred color, although most shades in that color family are considered appropriate. She has to cover her head with the Salwar-Kameez’s dupatta. Nowadays, Lehengas are also preferred as wedding dresses by Sikh brides. She wears a lot of traditional jewelry as well, starting from necklaces, earrings, bangles, to mantic, panja, and Payal.


Wedding Rituals

Sehra Bandi

On the day of the wedding, before the wedding party departs from the groom’s home, the turban is tied around the groom’s head by his father. He is handed over a fake sword by his father that he has to carry during all the wedding ceremonies. The sister of the groom then ties the Sehra, a curtain made of golden ribbons or flowers or even string of pearls, around the turban and covering the groom’s face.


Soorma and Kalgi 

The groom’s sister-in-law applies a black dot of kohl or Surma on the side of his forehead to ward off any negative energy from the groom. The sister of the groom then ties a piece of jewelry on his turban and stands between him and the door. She demands gifts in exchange for letting him go to the wedding. The groom has to present her with a gift before he can leave for the wedding venue.


Baraat 

Traditionally speaking, the groom is supposed to travel to the bride’s place on a mare. Nowadays, the groom takes a car for the most part of the journey and before entering the wedding venue mounts the mare, which is decorated with golden ribbons and other trimmings. Relatives and friends of the groom accompany him to the wedding venue. Music and Bhangra dance are an integral part of a Baraat. Generally, a band is hired to provide the music to which the Baraatis dance.


Milni 

The baraat is welcomed at the gate of the wedding venue, which is traditionally the Gurudwara, by the bride’s side. They are welcomed in by the bride’s side that sing hymns and utter their faith in God’s workings. Mostly men participate in the Milni event mediated by a priest. As each member of the baraat is introduced, the bride’s side offers them a garland and a warm hug.


Anand Karaj 

Anand Karaj literally means ‘Blissful Union’. The ceremony takes place at the Gurudwara prayer hall during the daytime or during afternoons. The Guru Granth Sahib is placed at a site of prominence and the marriage ceremony is designed around it. The bride and the groom sit side-by-side - the bride on the left side of the groom, facing the Guru Granth Sahib. The ceremony starts with the couple and their parents standing up to offer Ardaas to ‘Waheguru’, after which singing of Shabads or hymns is done. The marriage can be performed by any Amritdhari Sikh that is someone who had undergone the Amrit Initiation in Sikhism. He explains to the couple the significance of the marriage, the duties that each needs to perform within the sacred relationship, and the general idea of leading a pious life according to Sikh tenets. The couple then bows down before the Guru Granth Sahib. The father of the bride places a saffron-colored scarf on the groom’s shoulder and the other end of the same on his daughter’s hand. Thus, they are joined and ready to take the Lavaas or vows of marriage.


Lavaan Pheras 

The person conducting the marriage recites the four Lavaa or stanzas from the Guru Granth Sahib. After he has completed reading the first stanza, the couple rises from their seats and slowly walks around the Guru Granth Sahib in a clockwise direction, with the groom leading the bride.  After completion of the round, they come back to their positions but remain standing for the remaining three hymns. The process of circumambulation is repeated three more times after each Lavaa. The raagis sing the Lavaas in the background while the couple performs the Pheras.


Sadaa Suhagan 

The bride changes her wedding outfit and gets dressed in the outfit and jewelry gifted to her by the groom’s side. Elders of the family bless the bride with cash gifts and wishes of Sada Suhagan, meaning may the bride be lucky to never experience widowhood.


Reception party

This ceremony is just for enjoyment. The reception party is at the location where food and drink are served and guests enjoy lots of music and entertainment.


Roti

The bride is served her first meal as a married woman. The meal is safeguarded with a crimson shawl and presented with money and later shared with her husband.


Doli

The bride sits in a traditional Doli which is lifted by four people, this is a very emotional moment for her parents as their daughter is leaving her home to start her new life. The mother of the bride stands behind her holding a scarf or her sari palla while the bride showers rice all over the room with rice, praying her home to remain happy and prosperous forever and she is escorted to her car. Welcoming the new Bride
The bride generally receives a warm welcome when she reaches the groom’s home. She is showered with flowers and fed sweets. Relatives and neighbors come over to meet the new bride and offer her blessings.



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